When i am procrastinating

Hi, it’s me again and i got to admit we didn’t meet that often these days, not because i want to avoid your existence or had any hard feeling toward you but it seems your story were too common and uninteresting to the readers.

So how should i begin this with you…. owh i know it happened after a call from my friend to tell me he booked a ticket for the midnight movie, it was just about i hit on my slimy bed as i usually execute the habit i formed to sleep early every night if only nothing trigger my naughty spirit.

As so i decide to overlook my blood pressure tonight and hang out with my friends into the late hour since it’s still the festive season as well it is fun to break the rules once in a blue moon while let my inner sense to bloom. Strolling in the night city and sight seeing the bistro, bars still filled the darkness with light and noise like flowers spreading every last bits of its spring wonders.

The movie was just okay, i dozed in a few scene nearing the end of the film as crude humor and action scene was not my cup of tea despite such high praise, review and rating on the net. It was about 2am when we out of the cinema, the breezing late night wind refreshed the space and time; settled the harsh and lush string of attraction between peoples.

This night i didn’t create any dreams, perhaps i was too tired until the first ray of light touched me lit up the time beneath my deep hard core, ticking it self, winding the pendulum of life.

Dear diary thanks for the hold, the stop of urgency i forced into my self without i acknowledge, it started to consumed me; before forgetting the initial dream i crafted, please let me recall the flow of swing in the current of time as a way to remember my self…

A million thanks for endured my nonsense to let my self procrastinate a little while from the exhausted lost sense.

Copyright ©- Davis Cheng

 

 

First Dream of Life 生命の初梦

“Mom…Mom…There is something i wanted to tell you long time ago, i tried to tell you through my moving hand and eyes but you seems to need more clue to find out what i really want to tell.”

“I did not give up but kept within my memory until today… i will reveal the whole story to you. Why today? Because i finally learnt the voice as it enable me to speak with you.”

I remembered that day you named me, i was awoke from your call; i realized i can’t control my self yet, i was just waving in the pulse of yours, listen to the oscillating currents from your tranquil sound.

“Can i ask for more?”

Its moving… Things in different shape, various colour and most importantly i saw a someone with the look like you, mom. Everyday you bring the sky into my hearts, i even hover on the cloud; you even let me ride the wind, fly around the evergreen land. Its your mind i felt, we are close to each other by another inch of feeling.

“But i want to get closer with you, can i?”

One, two, three,four and five, i rest my palm on you while counting my fingers. I’m felt the warm on your hand as it delivered to my whole conscious; i tried my best to tell you how i cherish this moment, in your grasp. I will hold you forever to let you know my gratitude of granting my wish.

“It’s good enough, i’m satisfied”

I opened gaze today looking toward the sky but today it’s colour changed, filled with dark cloud soon the  ground become wet by the droplet fell from the sky; i gusted by the chilly wind and left alone wandered alone in the storm. I didn’t heard anything from you mom… but never mind i won’t give up to search for you.

“It’s freezing…”

Mom.. since when you did not realize my presence, did you forgot about me? I found your touch, but they were not warm anymore, and you were wearing a mask to cover your self, it was scary but i did not give up to stare on you, held your hand. Remember you still have me, is there any move i can make to return your smile?

“Last wish”

I want to move! Please let me to walk with you! Even the path was full with thorns, no matter how hard it might get, i will be your shoes, carry you to our dreamland again. Don’t worry mom… my step will always wait for you,  despite you getting slower and forgetful with each day passes. You will never left alone, so let’s try together

“Don’t ever sink and consumed by the slumber, wake up, mom!”

“You are making me sleepy too… see you in my dream mom…”

As the day getting darker….

Copyright ©- Davis Cheng

 

 

 

Please Don’t Close My Eyes 请不要闭上我的双眼..

“One step… two step… and squat down!”

“The handle… handle… where is it?”

“Okay, found it and open this feeling, this sound, this smell, food found!”

I quickly stuff in the food inside my empty tummy reminded myself of the sizzling pan fried sunny eggs as my usual breakfast. The Sun… Will I able to touch the warm and hold the light with my palm ever again? I’m waiting… waiting for ‘hope’ to realize my presence while sustaining my dimming life.

“I’m getting use to the darkness”

Being alone in the silent and dark room was not that scary anymore as I can create light in my imagination but it was cold, maybe it stained by my sadness or like everyone said today would be blue after all.

“I’m not shouting as loud as I can nor cry for someone to hear me.”

I became a listener to myself, decided which I can’t hurt my voice further; i think my eyes had swollen when it decided to stop flowing, there should be a path engraved with the dried out tears on top of my panda’s eyes patch, I wonder how i looks like. “Clown with dark patch drawn on his face?”

“I’m not hurting myself anymore.”

I learnt the painful lesson from panicked in the dark space, everything I once familiar with their appearance had become my obstacle, stopped me from finding my way to get out, hold my legs as so I tripped over them. I managed to touch the door knob but the door had lost its key and became a wall. I struggled to the point I wanted to break myself apart until my vision fail me, when I can felt something dripping out from my head before I lost my conscious. “I want to get out…”

“I must get hold of myself.”

After the tremor, I had locked up in the other side, this room of mine turned into a stranger’s isle. I raise my head, throw my gaze on the ceiling as I began to stake my hope on something above, hoping it will break apart to become into a spot light to shine on me.

The heat slowly engulf me, so as I usually complained to the sun in the outdoor of how much I hate its merciless heat but this instant I wanted its rays to found me, tied my up to its side. I lay on the floor; it was cozy enough to gradually give in myself into the state of subconscious.

“A scar?”

When I’m touching across the floor surface, I felt a rough line likely being forcefully torn up by the shock of tremor.

“It’s must be hurt, right? Mr. ground.”

“But don’t you worry; my mom told me the pain will fade away like the twinkle star if we sing its song.”

“Twinkle, twinkle little star… h…ow…how ie…i…wonder… mom, can I take a nap? I give my word, just a little while… I will wake up.”

“You little cry baby, I just start to get some sleep after the hassle this morning, and you woke me up again.”

“Who is talking?” I’m shocked. A man unveil in front of me, all I can see just him but everything still surrounded in dark. My heart still beating, I’m pretty sure of it. Could it be spirit from someone, am I close to become one of them?

“Hey…!”

He came up close to me and snapped my forehead out of my confusion.

“You called me, do you still remember? Never mind, I was living in the neighborhood and I heard your noise…”

I’m stunned, but it kind of comforting to have companion.

“I’m a magician you know?

Just when I’m about to ask more about him, he took out something and raise his hand in the dark. His wand was releasing a buzzing sound into the dark, I felt something flew across my cheek, the dark start to glow; a ring of glittering light surround a dark sphere filled the room. He told me he was amazed like me when he first discovered the glowing darkness.

“So can you repay me with your song?” He asked while yawning.

My voice let out upon glimpsing this mysterious view, its like the dark knight decide to unravel its heavy mask and rest his exhausted soul.

“Twinkle…twinkle little star .. I finished the song. The hypnotic glow settled my uncanny feeling, pain and worry fade away along with my strength.

He rush beside me, I couldn’t hear clear what he said, he screamed. I held his hand and used what left to whisper him.

“Please don’t close my eyes… its was very beautiful, but I still love with the…”

“Don’t give up, they are coming, I can felt their steps, just a little while” His voice reached me

“Thank you, Mr.Ground”

“Sorry, Sorry,Sorry…! I couldn’t do anything” he apologized

The debris on the ceiling shook, a light ray travel to her side, on her face and expand  through her entire body, it was the ray of sun in which she hoped, she loved.

“Look! There was person inside, get more help, hurried!” shouted the rescue team on the earthquake site. It appeared the entire land was suffered…

In memory of…. victims of earth quake in which recently happened in Taiwan during the festive season, tragedy of natural disaster happened in other countries in the past.

My deepest condolence…

Copyright ©- Davis Cheng